More Some Side Effects of Prostate Radiation that Oncologists Kind of Tell you About; or, the Agony of Anxiety, Anger and Aggression: The Three Amigos (Pt I)
A Eunuch's Dream 1874
This is one of those things they definitely don’t share with you. After my first round of Lupron, the side effects got so bad my anxiety level reached new heights especially since a second shot was waiting in the wings. Out of desperation, I wrote my oncologist for some help, some mental health help, before they referred me to a psych-oncologist (didn’t know these people even existed) whose advice was somewhat questionable. For example, “Take off your shoes and walk in the grass.” I live in a condo. Other than that, the recommendations were, honestly, painfully obvious, “Eat right, exercise, get enough sleep.” Guess that would apply to a pregnant woman as well. It was at that point that I asked to see a psychiatrist and that was helpful, especially in combination with my partner’s suggestion we smoke a bit of weed at bedtime. Regardless, no one told me about this and when it happened to me it was both shocking and revealing. My partner and I were driving back from a PCRI Conference in Los Angeles, which dealt with issues associated with prostate cancer. I had been on edge the entire day, anxious, not feeling in control of myself or my emotions. Thank you, Lupron. At some point, she said she thought I was “depressed” and I barked at her, “I’m not depressed!” which is the first indication that one is depressed and the depression had to be attributed (at least in part) to Lupron. Bit like an alcoholic repeating he can quit anytime. To which she responded, “Whoa!” a natural response to that kind of unmitigated anger. Of course, we had our arguments (what couples don’t?), but I never screamed at her like that before. Nor did anyone tell me at the outset of treatment nor during treatment nor after treatment that Lupron could cause emotional lability, such as unprovoked crying, irritability, impotence, anxiety, anger and aggression. At least, I don’t remember hearing it. It seemed counterintuitive that a decrease in testosterone, that manliest of hormones, would contribute to depression, anxiety, anger and aggression, but there’s a name for it, which I had never heard of…Irritable Male Syndrome (IMS), which has nothing to do with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS), but which might not preclude having IBS that would be another irritation one doesn’t need. More on IMS to follow.